From Russia Mit Love

Background
The NBA, desperate for ratings, has decided to go for a massive shakeup. Stern decreed that prior to the 2008/2009 season a fantasy draft would take place. Several owners and general managers resigned in protest, among them those from the Portland Trail Blazers. A Russian drug lord bought the team and has taken over all business and personnel decisions. His goal is to prove the genetic superiority of Russian men. To this effect, he has decreed the following:
1 – No American born player shall play for the Blazers.
2 – Every Russian player in the league will play for the Blazers.
3 – Since there are only two Russians in the league (Kirelinko and Kryapa), the rest of the roster will be filled out with guys from Eastern bloc countries like Georgia, Solvenia, etc.
4 - Our glorious leader has no qualms with under the table dealings to tilt things in our favor, therefore any trades the computer will accept, I can make.
5 - Our glorious leader does not know much about basketball, and has a quick trigger finger. Therefore, a player that struggles may very well find himself riding the bench for a month or so. Non Russians will be especially prone to this treatment. Conversely, a player who plays well, particularly a Russian, may find himself playing 48 minutes each game.
6 - A championship would be nice, but just as important is proving that Russians are dominant individual players. That is, an All Star appearance or All NBA selection of a Russian player will be regarded with just as much celebration as a championship.

Roster

PG
Beno Udrih – 76 – Slovenia
Roko Ukic – 74 – Croatia
Vassilis Spanoulis – 67 – Greece

SG
Marko Jaric – 75 – Serbia
Sasha Pavlovic – 71 – Serbia

SF
Andrei Kirilinko – 80 – Russia
Viktor Kryapa – 68 – Russia

PF
Vladimir Radmonovic – 78 – Serbia
Slava Medvedenko – 70 - Ukraine
Oleksiy Pecherov – 68 – Ukraine

C
Rasho Nesterovic – 75 – Slovenia
Zaza Pachulia – 71 – Republic of Georgia
Kyrylo Fresenko – 62 – Ukraine

You should have seen the look on the other GM's faces when I landed the second overall pick and took Kirilinko, then took Kryapa in the second round. Fools and their American arrogance!

Over the course of the next few years, I hope that a few Russian guys show up in the draft. The first year, unfortunately, offers nobody from Russia, and only 3 players from Eastern bloc countries.

Wish me luck!

Wow...awesome...the ultimate in humor franchises...by the way. Where is Sasha Vujacic from?

It has been a rough adjustment to the NBA game so far. We defeated the evil Lakers in the very first game, but on December 1st we stand at 2-17. But no matter! My advisors tell me that it will take some time for the team to get used to each other. So many talented players, so little playing time to go around! Many players, including Jaric, Pavlovic, and Udrih are complaining about playing time. Pavlovic and Jaric are dangerously close to getting thrown to the bench, because neither have played particularly well and they aren’t happy splitting time at the SG position. Udrih started the season at 30mpg, got used to it, but then had a game with 0 assists. I became unhappy, and took away some of his time and gave it to Ukic. And Ukic has responded by being awesome! So now Ukic starts ahead of Udrih. On the big man front, Nesterovic and Radmonovic have played well, and Zaza has played well when he is not injured.

Of course, the best players have been Kirilinko and Kryapa. They have used their Russian leadership, valor, and love making ability to destroy all comers! Well, except for those few teams that beat us, but they were mere aberrations.

OOC: It is going to be incredibly important for me to manage egos well on this team, because if somebody gets pissed and demands a trade there is hardly anybody to go trade for. There are still some eastern bloc guys out there, like Peja (Serbia) and Vujajic (Slovenia), but I don’t exactly have trade bait. And since there will be so few draft prospects (this year only three; and all are from Hungary which is close to not counting), I will have to develop all my talent in house. So, erm, let’s go Zaza!

The battle for starting shooting guard is heating up! In the most recent game against the Jazz, Jaric had all but 40 of my team's points! Pavlovic responded by shooting so much as to keep the other team focused on him, while the rest of my valient players went in for the kill! If a few of his shots had gone in, we would have completely dominated!

OOC: Jazz 74, Blazers 47. Jaric went 2-8 for 7 points, while Pavlovic went 0-15 in 22 minutes for 0 points.